Occupy Womb, Occupy Belly

Written on 11-11-11 at ALisa Starkweather’s Belly & Womb Conference

Walking into the space, there is nothing but friendly and familiar faces to behold.  So much red infused through the crowd and decoratively adorning the space.  I am immediately reminded of the sacred space this collective group of women hold.  What a blessing.

Women are simply themselves here.  They sing, dance, laugh, cry, scream and let the Shakti energy move them here – Because they can.  No judgement.  Now that is beauty.  The false sense of self can be dropped because the space is so held.  Only the true self checks in at the door there.  Every woman there is ready to welcome you into the space with a sly smile of knowing that we can all share.

In one corner of the room I see one of my sisters belly dancing in front of the drumming women.  She is dancing alone, in front of everyone – No shame.  At the front of the group another sister is signing along with passion and deep connection to the song being sung on stage by our other sister.  It is incredible to see such a large group of women in one space, with all of their masks removed – This includes myself.

Dropping my subconscious mask is one of my favorite parts of this women’s circle.  I enter and without thinking, release the image that I feel I need to fulfill and show up as the person I am.  I cry and release grief in circle, I giggle with the women, I dance and open myself to the energy, I connect with new women, I left my sexy self shine.  I expose my soul.

When it comes down to it, I don’t really have a choice to do anything but be vulnerable there anyway.  There is a “tough love” inherent in the circle.  The most compassionate and loving tough love I have ever experienced.  We do deep emotional work in this circle.  If someone is locking down some part of themselves, or stuffing down some charged emotion, guaranteed it is going to come out here.  All the stored “stuff” winds up coming out because there is sacred space being held for that very reason.  Women supporting women, who each expect that because you showed up here, you are here to do the work.  Done and done.  Trust it is always valuable processing and the end result is a more freed soul.

(Image to the left is the Occupy Womb, Occupy Belly Altar at the conference this past weekend.) It is such an inspiration to show up to a circle like this, filled with so many authentically beautiful women.  Women being present, being themselves.  For me, it is a magickal mirror, reminding myself of my authentic beauty which is equally as inspiring to other women.  It is a reminder that the real me (by saying the “real” me, I am referring to whats true to my soul) is way cooler than whatever I might be trying to cover it up with at times in life.

My experience over the weekend reminded me of some incredibly sweet and juicy advice I received from a close woman of mine recently when I was feeling a bit distressed.  I was sharing with her how I was feeling triggered in a few ways and how when that happens to me, certain reactive behaviors emerge from me that don’t feel good to express.  So, she encouraged me to draw an image of myself in my minds eye – An image of my most authentic, beautiful, magnetic, enchanting, joyful self.  She asked me to name this “self” so I could call on it when I felt the need to.  I decided to name this persona of mine, Alexandra, which is my full name.  Once I had this image created, she said “Okay – This is your superhero self.  The archetypal self you wish to live in, in all-ways.  I encourage you to actively embody this when you feel yourself slipping into less than optimal reactive patterns.”  She went on to say, “But here is the secret:  That image you created of your superhero self in your mind – That is already you.  That is your soul envisioned.  Just let your soul shine.”

The perfect advice, in my opinion.  Alexandra is my soul and I let her shine constantly.  Damn does that feel good

Shine on, peeps.

Blessings,

~Ali

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